Black Wolf (Chapter 3) B

Anyway, as we headed along the pathway toward Back Lane, I realized that we were both gazing around at the old factory with the same distant look on our faces.

“You know it’s been sold, right?” I said to Key.

“Yeah…they’re knocking it down to build houses. It’s all fenced off now.”

I nodded. I could see the brand-new high-tech metal fencing they put up to replace the crappy old wire-mesh stuff that used to be there. The wire-mesh fencing had been easy to get through. Even if you didn’t know where all the gaps were- which we did- all you had to do was find a loose bit, lift it up, and crawl underneath. We used to spend hours messing around in the old factory.

“Do you remember that time your dad caught you in there with Taemin?” Key said.

“He didn’t catch us in there,” I corrected him. “We were just coming out.”

“Yeah,” Key grinned, “but your dad still went crazy, didn’t he?”

He’d actually gone crazier than crazy, he’d gone totally ballistic. I’ve never seen him so angry. Me and Taemin were only about thirteen at the time, and the first thing my dad yelled at me was- WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU TWO DOING IN THERE? Which was a bit embarrassing. And even when I’d finally convinced him that we hadn’t been doing anything illegal, he still didn’t let go of the matter. He just went on and on for hours about how dangerous it was, how stupid, how thoughtless, how irresponsible…

I found out later on that a twelve-year-old boy had been found dead in an abandoned warehouse a few days before. The kid had just wandered into the warehouse on his own and fallen through some loose floorboards. When his parents reported him missing, my dad had been part of the investigation team, and when the kid’s body was eventually found, it was my dad who had to tell the parents.

“You okay?” Key asked me.

“Yeah I was just thinking…”

“About what?”

“Nothing…it doesn’t really matter.”


We reached the end of the road now, and ahead of us was the narrow dirt track that we called Back Lane. It isn’t really called that- I don’t think it’s called anything officially. It’s just a dirt track- the kind of nameless path that doesn’t appear on maps- and most people don’t even know it’s there. The local kids all know about it because it’s a shortcut to the park, but the only adults you’ll ever see here are dog walkers and hobos and the occasional weirdo or two.

The air suddenly cooled as we entered the lane, the moonlight blocked out by the steep wooded bank that rose up on our right toward the factory fence. The ground beneath the hillside trees were covered with a dense thicket of brambles and weeds.

“I hope the den’s still there,” I said.

Key looked at me. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I don’t know…someone may have trashed it or something.”

“It’s there.”

“How do you know?”

Key shrugged. “I don’t…I’m just saying that’s all. I’m just saying it’ll probably be there.”

I looked at him. His face seemed so pale.

“Are you okay?” I said.


“It’s not too late to go back, you know.”

He didn’t say anything for a while, we just continued walking in silence. And that was fine with me. I hadn’t been here in a while and I was happy enough just looking around, remembering how everything was. It was strange how everything seemed so familiar. The lane itself, still rutted with bike tracks. The bank on our right, dark with trees. And on our left, another steep bank, this one leading down to a wasteground area of concrete and weeds that stretched away across to the docks. At the end of the wasteground, the huge rusted cylinders of two deserted gas towers glinted dully in the moonlight.

“The star’s going out tonight,” Key said quietly.

I stared at him. “What?”

He looked at me, his eyes pale and glassy. “Black Wolf,” he whispered. “That’s what he said this afternoon- the star’s going out tonight.”

“The stars are going out tonight? What stars?”

“No,” Key said. “The star is going out…not stars. The star.”

“What star?”

Key blinked, and all at once his eyes seemed to clear. He seemed lost for a moment or two, but then he blinked again, looked at me, and his face broke into a grin.

“What?” he asked me. “What are you looking at?”

I frowned. “Are you okay?”


“Nothing…just asking…Key?”


As I was speaking to him, his eyes had changed again only this time they weren’t pale or glassy, there were just staring straight ahead, glazed with fear.

“Key?” I said again.

“You said he wouldn’t be here…”


“You said…”

For a moment I thought he was talking about Black Wolf again, but when I turned my head and followed his gaze, I realized what he meant. About fifty feet away, four or five kids were hanging around by the junction of our little pathway that branches off Back Lane and heads down to the wasteground. At first, I only recognized one of them- Jonghyun Kim. But when I shielded my eyes against the gleam of the moonlight and took another look, I realized that the kid standing right next to him was Eunhyuk.

“It’s okay, Key,” I said. “There’s nothing to worry about.”

“You said he wouldn’t be here.”

“Yeah I know…but he’s not going to do anything,” I smiled at Key, trying to reassure him. “Come on,” I said, “just keep walking. It’ll be okay.”

It wasn’t a particularly confident smile, and I’m pretty sure that Key wasn’t fooled by it, but we both kept walking anyway. Neither of us wanted to, but the only other option was to turn around and start running away, and somehow that felt even scarier than not running away.

“They saw us,” Key said.

“I know.”

I could see them now. There were five of them: Jonghyun, Eunhyuk, and three others from their group. Jonghyun was his usual hyperactive self- jumping around, waving his arms, grinning like a madman- but I could tell by the nervous look on his face that he wasn’t quite sure of his situation. It was as if he wasn’t quite sure what he was supposed to be looking at. Me and Key? Or Eunhyuk and the others? He eyes were flicking around like pinballs. Eunhyuk and the other three didn’t have any doubts, though. They were all just standing there, hard as hell, their eyes fixed coldly on Key and me.

My heart was beating hard as we approached them, and I wondered if I looked as scared as I felt. Or worse- if I felt as scared as Key looked. He looked terrible- his face drained of color, his eyes unblinking, his skin all tense and twitchy. Nothing’s changed, I thought to myself. He’s still that petrified little kid who pissed himself on the bike…

We were almost at the junction now. The tree other kids were just slouching around in the back, all of them dressed in their gangster gear- unpleasant white track pants, large basketball shirts, chains, rings, bright white Nikes. Eunhyuk was standing right next to Jonghyun, and he looked just as intimidating as ever. The angular face, chiseled and lean. The dark narrow eyes, the slightly crooked mouth, the high forehead topped with his styled hair. He hadn’t changed a bit. In his short-sleeved shirt and his spotless jeans, he looked like a psychopathic catalogue model.

As we slowed to a halt in front of them all, I kept my eyes on Jonghyun. He had a scrunched-up plastic bag in his hand, shaped like a bottle, so I guessed he was on his way to the den. But what was he doing here with Eunhyuk?

“How’s it going?” he said chirpily, grinning from me to Key. “Sup?”

I nodded at him and spoke calmly. “Hey Jonghyun.”

He smiled at Key. “You good, dog boy?”

Key stiffened slightly at the name, but he didn’t say anything. He’d gotten used to the names a long time ago- Puppy Boy, Dog, Crazy Key- but he’d never forgiven Jonghyun for starting it all. And neither had I. Key had always been known as a slightly weird kid, but a few years ago, when he’d confided with Jonghyun about Black Wolf, and Jonghyun had gone around telling everyone else… well, from that moment on, Key had never been known as anything but weird.

“Yeah, nice one, Jonghyun,” I muttered.

He grinned hesitantly at me. “What?”

“Have you seen Minho and Taemin yet?” I asked him.

“I was just going there,” he said, his eyes flicking furtively at Eunhyuk.

“Where you going?” Eunhyuk said to him

Jonghyun grinned at him. “What?”

Eunhyuk just stared at him for a moment, then he looked over at me. “Where are you going, Lee?” he said.

I shook my head. “Nowhere, really…”


“The fair.”

Eunhyuk said nothing, just carried on starting at me. He had the kind of eyes that drill right through you and make you go cold inside. I watched, guiltily relieved, as he turned his attention to Key.

“What’re you lookin’ at.” Key just stood there, unable to speak.

Eunhyuk stared at him. “What’s the matter with you? You go something wrong with your head or something?”

Jonghyun snickered.

Eunhyuk turned his stare to him. “What?”

“Nothing,” Jonghyun said, grinning nervously. “I was just-“

“The fucker’s sick, Kim. It’s not funny.”

Jonghyun hesitated for a moment, his eyes flicking around, trying to work out if Eunhyuk was joking or not. When he realized that no one else was smiling, he looked back at Eunhyuk and grinned again. “What?” he said innocently, shrugging his shoulders. “I didn’t mean anything. I was just, you know…I mean Key’s cool. I was only…”

His voice trailed off as Eunhyuk turned away from him and looked at me. “What do you think, Lee?” he said, tilting his chin at Key. “You think he’s cool?”

“What’s it to you?” I heard myself say.

Eunhyuk smiled then, which surprised me. It was a genuine smile, no menace intended, and just for a second I saw a completely different Eunhyuk-harmless, friendly…charismatic, even.

“You like him, don’t you?” he said to me.


“Puppy boy there…you like him?”

I didn’t know what to say. Like him? Did I like him? I mean, what kind of question was that?

Eunhyuk looked at Jonghyun. “He likes him.”

Jonghyun grinned awkwardly. His mouth twitched as he looked for something to say, but nothing came out. He glanced over at me, then quickly turned back to Eunhyuk again. Eunhyuk’s smile had disappeared now. He was staring dead-eyed at Jonghyun.

“Friends,” he said quietly.

Jonghyun frowned. “What?”

“You know what a friend is, Kim?”

Jonghyun didn’t know whether to laugh or not. He glanced anxiously around again, looking for clues as to what he should do, but the other kids were just as blank faced as before, and there was no way he was getting any help from me or Key. He blinked quickly a couple of times, nervously licked his lips, then turned back to Eunhyuk.

“I don’t get it,” he said. “Is this some kind of joke or something?”

“No joke,” Eunhyuk said coldly. “Just a simple question- do you know what a friend is?”

“Yeah,” Jonghyun snorted, pretending to be offended, “of course I know what a friend is. Why wouldn’t I?”

For a moment or two, Eunhyuk just carried on staring at him, then all at once his eyes lost their coldness, his face broke into that smile again, and he stepped up and gave Jonghyun a friendly pat on the arm.

“See?” he said casually. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Jonghyun grinned, not quite so nervous now, but still a little unsure.

Eunhyuk gave him another reassuring pat on the arm.

“We’ll see you later then, okay?”

“Yeah…where are you going to be?”

But Eunhyuk didn’t answer him. He’d already turned around and was heading off down the pathway toward the wasteground, the three other kids following him. He wasn’t smiling anymore. His friendly face had shut down as soon as he’d turned away from Jonghyun. I’d seen it disappear-click-like a light going off. And now, as I watched him go, it was hard to believe he’d ever smiled before in his life.

I turned to Key.

He was watching Eunhyuk, too.

“Are you okay?” I asked him.

He nodded.

“You sure?”

“Yeah…” He looked at me, his brow furrowed. “He’s weirder than me, isn’t he?”

“Who- Eunhyuk?”


I laughed. “Yeah, I think he probably is.”


The den in Back Lane is hidden away at the top of the bank, about three-quarters of the way along the lane, you can’t see it from ground level, and unless you know exactly how to get there, it’s almost impossible to find. And even when you do know how to get there, it’s still pretty tricky.

“It’s up there,” Key said, pointing up the bank.


“There, by that tree stump.”

I couldn’t even see any tree stump. It was nine-thirty now and the only light around was the moon. The air was still hot and sticky.

“He’s right,” Jonghyun said, muscling in between Key and me. “It’s there, look.” He pointed up the bank. “You go around the back of that stump, then along that little ridge and up through the brambles-“

“Shut up, Jonghyun,” I said.

He gave me his hurt-little-boy look. “I’m only trying to help.”

“Yeah, okay,” I said. “Jonghyun Kim- Mr. Fucking Helpful.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you’re bad,” Key said.

We both looked at him.

“Bad?” Jonghyun grinned.

Key couldn’t help but smiling then, and that was all the encouragement Jonghyun needed. He put down his plastic bag and started dancing around, singing loudly in a stupid accent: “Because I’m baad, I’m baad…shit!”

Key laughed as Jonghyun moonwalked into the bank and fell over, and I found myself laughing too. I didn’t want to, but it was pretty funny.

That was the thing about Jonghyun- no matter what you thought of him, no matter how much you wanted to hate him, he could always redeem himself by making you laugh. But I knew I was all part of his act. Make them laugh, make them smile, make them forget about everything else…

I looked at him now, rolling around on his back, wiggling his arms and legs in the air, whooping and shrieking like he was in pain.

“Come on, Key,” I said, stepping up onto the bank. “Let’s go.”

A/N: Ah I cursed. So shoot me. D:< by golly am I tired D:

As usual Commment~ :D

Black Wolf (Chapter 3) A

Black Wolf (Chapter 3)

The next day, Saturday, was one of those days when you wake up in the morning, too hot to sleep, and you feel so sweaty and breathless that all you want to do is throw off the sheets and lie there naked, hoping in vain for a breath of cooling air to drift in through the open window…

But it never comes.

There’s no cool air out there, just a blazing white sun and a burned-blue sky and a heat so heavy, you can see it.

After I’d finally managed to peel myself off the bed and shuffle wearily into the bathroom, I took a cold shower, dressed in a T-shirt and shorts, and went downstairs. A fan was blowing in the kitchen, and all the windows were open, but the house was still uncomfortably hot. I went outside and found my mom sitting on a kitchen chair, sipping tea and smoking a cigarette. She was wearing shorts and a T-shirt, too, and although she looked really good in them- kind of baggy and shabby good- she also looked pretty tired and worn out.


“I thought you quit smoking,” I said to her, nodding at the cigarette in her hand.

She smiled at me. “I did.”

“Doesn’t look like it.”

“It’s just one…I needed it.”

“Yeah, okay,” I said, “You’d better not let Dad catch you.”

“He’s still asleep.”

“What time did he get home?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know…a few hours ago. Around eight.”

“When does he have to go back?”

“This afternoon.”

She took a long drag on her cigarette and gazed down the garden. Her smile was gone now, and she had a worried-about-dad look in her eyes. She was always worried about Dad, especially when he worked the night shifts.


My dad is a police officer- a detective sergeant in the Criminal Investigations Department- and it’s hard for Mom sometimes. It’s hard for the both of us, really. Even when Dad isn’t working late or doing night shifts, neither of us gets to see him much. There’s always something keeping him busy- overtime, paperwork, courses, training. I don’t really mind not seeing him too much. I mean, I don’t like it, but I’m used to it. I’ve grown up with it, just as I’ve grown up with and gotten used to all the other crap that goes with being the son of a police officer- the suspicions, the wariness, the stupid jokes. It’s not that I don’t like my dad being a policeman, because I do. As far as I’m concerned, it’s a pretty cool thing to do. It’s just that sometimes I wish he had a more normal job. An ordinary job. Nine to five, Monday to Friday. No weekend overtime, no worried Mom, no tired-out dad.

I looked at my mom, and I knew she didn’t really care too much about the long hours and the overtime and the fact that dad was tired all the time. The only thing she was really worried about-the only thing she’d ever been worried about- was that every time Dad left for work, there was always a chance he wouldn’t come home.

She put out her cigarette and smiled at me. “Everything okay?”

I smiled back. “Yeah.”

“Good. How’s Key? You went to see him yesterday, right?”

“Yeah, he’s okay. You know…same old Key. He’s coming to the fair with us today.”

Mom raised her eyebrows.

“What?” I said.

She shook her head. “Nothing…what time are you going?”

“About nine.” I flapped my T-shirt, trying to cool myself down. “A few of us might go back to Taemin’s place afterwards. He and Minho are having a little going-away party. They said I can stay over if I want.”

Mom grinned. “They said?”

“Yeah,” I said, blushing slightly. “Jonghyun’s probably going to be there, and Minho…”

“And Taemin.”

I shook my head. “He’s just an old friend, mom.”

“I know,” my mom laughed. “I’m only kidding.”

“Is it okay if I sleep over?”

She nodded. “I don’t see why not. Make sure you take your phone with you though. And be careful, okay?”


She wiped some sweat from her forehead and squinted up at the sky. The air was shimmering now, hazing in the heat, and in the distance I could see things that weren’t there- silver seas, floating reflections, mirrors on the horizon. The heat was distorting the world.

“You’d better take a jacket tonight,” my mom said.

I looked at her. “What?”

“I think it’s going to rain.”


I spent the rest of the day doing nothing- just hanging around, waiting for the night to come. I didn’t like admitting it to myself, but I was really looking forward to going out for a change. I was still a bit wary of seeing Taemin and the rest of them, and throughout the day I kept hearing the echoes of a faint whispered voice somewhere in the back of my mind- be careful, don’t go…be careful, don’t go- but I was determined to ignore it. I hadn’t been out anywhere for ages. I hadn’t felt excited for a long time. I wasn’t going to like some stupid whispering voice ruin my day.

I couldn’t hear it anyway.

It wasn’t there.

My dad woke up around midday, and I managed to see him for about ten minutes before he went back to work. He was in a hurry- sitting in the kitchen- bolting down some bacon and eggs- so we didn’t have much time to talk.

“Are you okay?” he asked me.


“Doing anything tonight?”

“Me and Key are going to the fair.”

He nodded, chewing vigorously. “Well, be careful up there.”

I smiled to myself, wondering how many more people were going to tell me to be careful today.

“I mean it, Onew,” my dad said. “There’s been a bit of trouble at the fair these few days, so make sure you’re alert, okay?”

“What kind of trouble?”

“The usual- fights, drugs, robberies. It’s going to really hot and crowded there tonight, so it’s probably going to be even worse.”

“I’ll be careful,” I promised.

“Okay,” he smiled, “I know you will.” He took a big gulp of tea, wiped his mouth, got up from the table and rubbed his unshaven chin. “Right,” he said, “well I better get going.”


Later, at around six o’clock, when mom went to the corner store, I went into the little room at the back of the kitchen where my dad kept all his wine and I picked out the cheapest looking bottle I could find. My dad liked his wine, and there were quite a few bottles in there, so I didn’t think it’d be likely for him to miss one.

Then I went back upstairs, hid the bottle, and started getting ready.

I put some music on- Forevermore, James Ingram.

I showered again.


Picked out some clothes- combat shorts, baggy T-shirt, sneakers.

Got dressed to more music- Now and Forever, Richard Marx.

Studied myself in the mirror. Changed my shirt, changed it back again…changed my shorts, changed them back again…

And then I just hung around some more- lying on my bed, trying not to get too sweaty…trying not to ask myself why I was making so much effort, why I cared what I looked like, why I was feeling so tingly and weird…

Why anything?

Why not?

Be careful…

Shut up.


At five to nine, I went downstairs and popped my head around the living room door to say goodbye to my mom. She was sitting on the sofa, watching TV.

“I’m going now,” I told her.

“Okay,” she smiled. “Did you bring a jacket, in case it rains?”

I showed her the backpack in my hand, taking care not to hit it against anything. I could feel the weight of the wine bottle inside.

My mom nodded. “Have your phone?”

“Yup, fully charged.”

“Okay,” she said. “Well, have fun!”


She smiled. “And don’t do anything I won’t do.”

She always said that whenever I’d go out- don’t do anything I won’t do. I’ve never understood what that means.


Key was waiting for me at the gate of his garden when I arrived. Black Wolf was in the shed, and Key was just standing there, gazing out over the garden. He was wearing skinny jeans and a slightly baggy hoodie.

“Aren’t you hot in that?” I said to him.

He looked at me. “It’s going to rain later.”

I held up the backpack in my hand. “Can I leave this in your shed?”

He nodded.

I went over to the shed, took out the bottle of wine, wrapped it in a plastic bag, and threw the backpack inside.

Key patted his pocket and smiled at me. “I’ve got some too.”


He glanced secretly at his house, then turned his back on it and leaned towards me. “Rum,” he whispered.


He grinned. “One of those little bottles, you know…pocket size. Mom drinks it with milk.”

I stared at him. “Milk?”

He nodded. “She likes it with a box of chocolate.”

It sounded pretty weird to me, but then Key’s mom had always been pretty weird. Once, when Key had opened his packed lunch, the entire lunchbox was full of raisins. Nothing else, just raisins.

“Come on,” I said to Key. “Let’s go.”

We left by the alleyway and headed up the street.


It was really nice being out and about- the sun set, but it was still burning, music was drifting out from open windows…there was a real kind of Saturday-night feel to the air. Things were happening. People were going out, or getting ready to. The night was coming alive.

“Ready?” I asked Key.

He smiled at me. “Yeah.”


At the end of our street there’s a fenced lane that leads down to the river, and as we approached it, a scruffy-looking guy with dirty blond dreadlocks came up the lane and climbed over the gate into the street. He was tall, in his twenties. He had pierced eyebrows, a ring on his lip, and he was wearing worn-out white overalls with the pants legs rolled up. I’d never seen him before, but as we turned left toward the main road, and the dreadlocked guy went past us, heading down a smaller street, he nodded his head at Key. Key smiled and nodded back at him.

“Who’s that?” I asked Key when the guy was out of earshot.

“I don’t know,” he said. “I’ve seen him down by the river a couple of times. He’s got a trailer down there.”

“A trailer?”


“Since when?”

“A few weeks.”

“Is he…a traveler or something?”

Key shrugged. “I don’t know.”

We crossed the main road and headed straight on along the little pathway that runs between the old factory parking lot and a row of car repair places. At least, they used to be car repair places. They’re all closed down now- either boarded up or just abandoned. Beyond them, over to the right, I could see the tops of the old factory buildings looming up darkly against the evening clouds.


The factory has been empty and neglected for as long as I can remember. It’s a huge place, a sprawling expanse of dull gray buildings, workshops, offices, tanks and vats, chimneys and towers. It even had its own little reservoir- a small concrete lake surrounded by big black pipes and filled to the brim with stagnant green water. God knows what it was used for. I think the factory used to make engines for trains or airplanes or something…but I could be wrong.

Part B! :D



Key grips the merry-go-round rails and leans back, his face upturned to the clouds. His hair is a riot of wind-whipped motion. His open-mouthed grin seems to gulp at the stream of air. The purple jacaranda trees in the park behind him are a horizontal streak of color.

Onew planned this shot for weeks; buying a neutral-density filer and waiting for the perfect overcast day, so he could keep the shutter open long enough to make it work. He braced himself against the merry-go-round’s central post and held the camera steady, while Key spun out on the farthest edge: a blur of jubilant energy, all beauty and youth and motion.

A/N: Short and Sweet? :3

Read more OnKey at:

Here :D

Black Wolf (Chapter 2) Part B

There were other bad times with Eunhyuk, too. And it wasn’t just me and Key who suffered, either. Eunhyuk had it in for all of us- Minho, Taemin, Jonghyun…anyone who was smaller than him, basically. Smaller of different. Weaker or younger…whatever. I’m sure you know what it is. I mean, we all have our own Eunhyuk’s when we were ten years old, right?

That kind of stuff was mostly in the past now. None of us had gotten any trouble from Eunhyuk recently, but we’d all be scared shitless of him at the time. Which was why it was so strange that in the last couple of years or so, Jonghyun had started hanging out with Eunhyuk. I’d seen him in town with them, robbing people, and I’d heard rumors that he went clubbing with them too.

So, yeah, I knew what Key meant about Jonghyun and Eunhyuk, and to a certain extent I shared his concerns. But at the same time, I kind of understood that things change- people grow up, their fears move on, their childhood nightmares don’t scare them so much anymore. It wasn’t like that for me and Key, and understanding it didn’t make it any easier to accept. But, as far as I was concerned, if Jonghyun wanted to spend his time with our childhood nightmare…well that was his decision. There wasn’t much we could do anyway.

I looked at Key. “It’ll just be the five of us at first,” I told him. “Me and you, Taemin, Minho, and Jonghyun. Taemin wants us all to meet up in the old den, you know- the one up by the bank by the factory. Just the five of us…no one else allowed. Like a den party.”

Key smiled warily. “A den party?”

“Yeah, just like the old days- bring a bottle, have a few drinks…”

“No one else allowed?”

“No one else.”

Key was starting to relax a bit now. The troubled look was fading from his eyes, and he was beginning to seem carefully interested. He’d always like being in the dens- I think he felt safe and comfortable in them. To the rest of us, they were just places to go, places to be, places to do things we weren’t supposed to do. But to Key I think they were some kind of sanctuary, a refuge from the big bad world. He even used to go to the dens on his own sometimes, which I always thought was a pretty cool thing to do- just sitting there on your own, hidden away in the secret place, no one knowing where you were…

I wish I’d had the courage to do that.

“So,” I said to Key, “what do you think? Do you want to go?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know…”

“We could just go to the den, if you want…just for an hour or so. We don’t have to go to the fair afterward.”

“What about Jonghyun?”

“He’ll be okay…don’t worry about it. I mean, you know what he’s like- he’ll just be the same old Jonghyun with us.”

“Same old Jonghyun,” Key mumbled.

“Yeah, I know…”

“He used to come around here.”

“I know.”

“He made me think he was okay.”

Key was beginning to look sad again now.

“It’s okay,” I told him. “It doesn’t matter if you don’t want to go. I mean, it’s not a big deal.”

He looked at me. “You want to go, don’t you?”

I shrugged. “I really don’t mind.”

He smiled. “I can tell.”

“Tell what?”

“You want to see Taemin.”

“No I don’t.”

“I can tell.”

“Well, you’re wrong.”

He shrugged, still smiling at me.

I shook my head. “Why would I want to see him?”


“Because what?”

“I don’t know…just because.”

I shook my head again. “You don’t know what you’re saying, Key.”

He grinned at me. “I know.”

“I mean, I wouldn’t mind seeing him…just to say bye and everything…but I’m not bothered if I don’t.” I looked at him. “There’s nothing between us anymore, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“Right,” he said.

I glared at him, trying to look annoyed, but it was impossible. The way he was just sitting there, staring wide-eyed at me, grinning from ear to ear…I couldn’t help but smiling back.

“I don’t even know why I’m listening to you,” I said.


I grinned at him. “You think you’re funny?”

He laughed. “I know I’m funny.”

We continued sitting there for a while, just soaking in the sunlight and talking about things- SAT’s, college…nothing important really- and then around two o’clock we both heard the sound of the front door slamming, and Key said he’d better go inside.

“It’s my dad,” he said, suddenly really serious. “He’ll probably want something to eat.”

Key didn’t like talking about his parents, so I didn’t ask him where his dad had been, or why he couldn’t get something to eat himself, I just nodded and started to get up.

“What about tomorrow then?” I asked him. “Do you want to go?”

“Sure, I guess.”


He nodded vaguely, but he wasn’t really paying attention to me anymore- he was concentrating intently on the back door of his house, looking out for his dad.

“I’ll come around here about nine,” I told him. “Is that okay?”

He didn’t answer.

“Key?” I said.

He glanced at me with a questioning face.

“Tomorrow night- I’ll come around at nine o’clock.”


His head snapped back to the house again as he heard his dad’s voice calling out- Kibum!

“I’d better go,” he said quickly, running off toward the house. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See you.” I called out after him. “Don’t worry about anything.”

He was already halfway across the garden now, and I knew he wasn’t listening to me anymore. I watched him as he opened the back door and hurried into the house, and I wondered, as I’d wondered so many times before, what kind of life he had in there.

It was hard to imagine.

His parents had never been involved with him too much. They were cold people, ugly-minded, uncaring…the kind of parents who make you appreciate your own.

I stared at his house for a moment, trying to picture what happened behind those brick walls, but all I could see was a formless haze of dull gray mist. Cold ugly voices, resentment, hidden feelings.

I sensed something then- a soundless movement- and when I looked down at my feet I saw Black Wolf walking past me into the shed.

He didn’t look at me.

He didn’t move his tail.

His voice didn’t whisper inside my head…

Be careful.

Don’t go.

…and even if it did, I didn’t hear it.







A/N: I know I know guys. Key? Key??? Key not care about looks? Oh NO D: bear with me here.  It’s okay. You’ll like Key’s character. i hope D: –crosses fingers-  Sorry I made him seem really different D: -hides from key fans- ):

And oh yes. I’m bringing Suju in this. :D

Black Wolf (Chapter 2) Part A

Black Wolf (Chapter 2)

The houses in our street are all pretty much the same- flat-fronted terraced houses with small front yards and walled back gardens. The gardens on my side of the street go back onto a scrubby little hill that leads down to the river, while the back gardens of the houses on Key’s side of the street look out over a shared alleyway and a partly ruined church to the main road that runs parallel to our street. The main road runs south from the town center all the way down to the docks at the bottom of the hill, about half a mile or so from our block.

The alleyway that leads around to the back of Key’s place isn’t the nicest place in the world. It’s quite cramped, for a start, kind of narrow and poky, and it has high brick walls on either side that shut out the light, so even in the middle of summer it’s always pretty gloomy and damp. The crumbly old walls are topped with barbed wire and broken glass, and for some strange reason the bricks have always been stained with layers of grimy black soot. The alleyway is also the place where everyone leaves their garbage, so it’s always cluttered with crap- bulging black garbage bags, overflowing trash cans, empty bottles, beer cans, dog shit…all kinds of crap. So, like I said, it’s not the nicest place in the world, but I always used the alleyway whenever I went around to see Key, and he always used it whenever he came around to see me.

It was our route to each other.

It must have been around noon on Friday when I left my house and headed down the street toward Key’s place. The sun was burning high in the sky, filling the air with a bright white haze, and as I crossed the road and entered the alleyway I could feel the stickiness of melted asphalt clinging to the soles of my sneakers. It was that kind of day- the kind of day when the heat is so thick that everything seems to slow down and melt, including your brain. And I was already suffering from a brain-melting lack of sleep anyway. But despite all that, I was actually feeling surprisingly fresh. I’d changed out of the dirty clothes I’d been wearing for the last few days, I’d taken a shower, I’d even managed to get some of the knots out of my hair. God knows why I even bothered. I mean, I was only going to see Key, and he’d never cared what I looked like. I don’t think he’d ever cared what anyone looked like.

But I was feeling kind of okay, and even as I followed the alleyway down to Key’s back gate, and the sunlight gave way to the cold shadows of the blackened brick walls, I still felt better than I had for a long time.

The gate was closed when I got there. It’s a big old wooden gate, too tall to see over, so I couldn’t see if Key was in his garden or not, and I couldn’t hear anything, either. But I knew he was in there. I always knew. I’d stood at his gate so many times over the years that I could somehow feel if Key was in his garden or not. I’ve never understood how it worked, this feeling, but it always did. And it was always right. In fact, I trusted the feeling so much that if ever I felt he wasn’t there, I didn’t even have to open the gate. I could just turn around and go home without so much as a flicker of doubt.

He was here today, though.

I knew it.

The gate led me through to the bottom of the garden, and when I looked over to my right I saw Key sitting on a rickety old wooden chair by the shed. He didn’t seem to have noticed me though. He was just sitting there, gazing out over the garden, his eyes fixed on nothing, and his head perfectly still. The only movement I could see in him was a very faint fluttering of his lips, as if he was whispering secrets to himself under his breath. Apart from that, though, he was as still as a statue.

The shed door was open. I glanced around the garden- a scrubby mess of a sun-browned lawn and overgrown borders- and I spotted Black Wolf sitting in the shade of a nearby tree. He wasn’t doing much- just sitting there, looking around, lazily swinging his tail.

“Hello, Onew.”

At the sound of Key’s voice, I looked over and saw him smiling at me.

“Hey, Key,” I said. “How’s it going?”

He nodded his head, still smiling. “Yeah, everything’s okay…you know…nice and hot.” He looked up, and then almost immediately looked back at me again. “Blue skies,” he said.


As I started walking over toward him, I couldn’t help smiling to myself. Key always managed to make me smile. His face made me smile, his smile made me smile, everything about him made me smile. It was strange, really, because most people didn’t have this effect on me. I didn’t understand why nobody liked Key either. His eyes were big and attentive, there was something about the way he dressed that made him look strangely appealing. He didn’t actually dress that way. It’s just that his clothing always seemed to make him appear that way. I used to think that his parents usually bought most of his clothes and they usually bought him a bigger size so that he might grow into them. The oversized shirts just emphasized his fragile body structure. But over the years I’d seen Key dressed in all kinds of clothes- brand new shirts, the perfect size…shapeless coats, baggy shorts, even skin-tight jeans- and eventually I came to realize that it didn’t matter what he was wearing. Everything just made him look…I don’t know. He was just different.

But I liked the way he looked- his weirdness, his difference, his oddity. It suited him. It helped to make him what he was.

It also helped to make his life really hard sometimes.

But right now- as he got up from his chair, went into the shed, and came back out carrying another rickety chair for me- right now, he was fine. I watched him, still smiling, as he set the chair down next to his, swept the dust off it, and gestured awkwardly for me to sit down.

I sat.

Key sat.

We grinned at each other.

“So,” I said, “you’re doing okay then?”

He nodded, smiled, then glanced over at Black Wolf. The ‘dog’ was just sitting there, not doing anything.

I said, “He’s getting big.”


I gazed at the big black ‘dog’. I looked at Key now. He was watching his dog, just sitting there watching it, perfectly content. And part of me envied him for that. I knew it was wrong of me, because I knew that Key’s peace of mind wasn’t quite normal- whatever that means- and I knew that he had stuff going wrong in his head, but every now and then I couldn’t help thinking how nice it must be to find such contentment in the simplest things.

A lawn mower had started droning away in the distance now, and I could smell the drift of freshly cut grass in the air. Green is fresh like water, I found myself thinking. A fine sky this evening

I wiped a bead of sweat from my brow.

“Taemin called me last night,” I said to Key.

He looked at me. “Taemin?”

“Yeah…he was asking if we wanted to go to the fair tomorrow night. You know the carnival up at the park?”

Key didn’t say anything; he just gave me a confused look.

“Yeah, I know,” I told him. “I was a bit surprised to hear from him too. What it is, though, he’s got this idea about us all meeting up again, you know the old gang… like a going away party kind of thing.”

“Who’s going away?”

“Taemin and Minho…they’re moving away in September.”

“I know.”

“And Jonghyun’s not going to college-“



“Jonghyun’s going to the fair?”

Key’s eyes were starting to look troubled now.

“It’s okay,” I told him. “We don’t have to go if you don’t want to. I mean, I’m not really sure I want to go.”

“He likes you,” Key said.


“Taemin- He likes you.”

“Yeah, well,” I said. “He likes you, too. He always has.”

“Not like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like he likes you,” he said, smiling.

I frowned at him. “What?”

He didn’t say anything for a moment, just carried on smiling at me, but then his eyes blinked, his face suddenly dropped, and his smile disappeared. “Is Jonghyun going to be with Eunhyuk?” he asked.

It was a good question, a question I’d been asking myself ever since Taemin had called me- if Jonghyun was going to be there, did that mean Eunhyuk and his group was going to be there, too?

Eunhyuk was a few years older than the rest of us, and when we were kids, he used to scare the shit out of us. His group- a bunch of tough kids from the other side of town. It was on the other side of the river, rough part of town. They were the ones we were always running from. I remember once, when me and Key were riding our bikes back home from town…I suppose we were about…ten or eleven at the time. Anyway, we were riding along this little lane by the river, a shortcut back from town, and suddenly I heard this whizzing sound, like something had just cut through the air, then a quick dull pop, and then something pinged off the frame of Key’s bike. Key heard it, too, and we both pulled up and looked around, and that’s when we saw one of Eunhyuk’s group members. He was standing in a little stub of tree beside the lane, pointing an air rifle at us. As he grinned and pulled the trigger again, we hit the pedals and got going, and then Eunhyuk and some other kids suddenly appeared from farther down the lane, and some of them had air rifles too, and they were shouting and laughing and chasing the hell out of us, scaring us both to death…

Jesus, I’d never been so scared in my life. And Key…well, Key was so scared that he pissed himself. I’ve never forgotten it. I was pedaling along like a madman behind him, my legs pumping, my lungs bursting, and when I first heard the splashing sound, I didn’t realize what it was. I was so intent on getting away from the kids behind us that I barely noticed it. I wasn’t until Key’s bike began to slow down in front of me, and I looked up to see what he was doing…and I saw him standing awkwardly on his pedals, kind of squirming and fiddling with his fly…and even then, it took me a moment to realize that his pants were soaked and a stream of yellow liquid was spraying out into the air behind him.

Part B :D

Heat Wave

It was a crazy June heat wave, and Onew walked behind Key in the same blue trunks he’d worn for years, their two beach towels draped across his shoulders. Barefoot, Key picked her way across the tiny brittle lawns and along the hot gravel between the mobile home units. He wore the same thing, but somehow managed to look so much better in it.

An old man sat on his trailer deck in a porch swing and turned his head to watch them-or rather Key- pass. Onew understood. He knew how beautiful Key was now.

He had seen it coming years ago, before anyone else. He had known his baby fat would fade away. He sensed that his supple, athletic body would someday look like the way it did now. He was happy to be seen with Key- even though the old man probably thought he was just his towel boy and not his best friend.

Key opened the gate in the pool yard fence, and Onew followed him inside. He watched Key walk ahead of him across the bright concrete, watched Key climb the steps to the deck. With his hips and his strong, lean back it was hard to guess his age from behind; he might have been in his twenties. And Onew was amused to notice that, like Key’s smile, Key’s lower back now bore a single dimple, on the left side, just above his trunks.

The village swimming pool had been placed in the exact center of the park a decade ago in the unfounded hope that it would attract more young residents. It was unheated and above ground- a perfectly round belt of steel, lined with blue plastic and filled with water. A wooden deck had been added along one side a few years ago, but the sun-worn pine was already graying the color of boiled beef. As far as Onew could tell, he and Key were the only ones who ever swam here.

When Onew was smaller, the pool had seemed a treacherous place with no shallow end. He would tread the water in panic, always within reach of the side, always under his mother’s watchful eye. But now, standing on the bottom, the water reached only to his belly button.

Key swam with him awhile, and then he pulled himself out of the pool and sat of the edge of the deck, shaking out his hair. Key threw the towel lazily on his hair, and stretched out to dry in the sun.

From the pool Onew studied him as Key lay on his stomach. Key’s shoulders, back, and legs glistened with beaded water. Onew floated on his back awhile looking up at the sky, and they he watched Key some more. Standing there in the cool water, Onew caught a hopeful, shimmering glimpse of summer- that long, hot respite that would be here soon. Away from school, things felt simpler. The hard, bitter nut he held in his stomach all year dissolved a little in those long July days.

In Summer it was mostly just Key and him- blissfully cut off from the rest of the world by virtue of this ramshackle, out-of-the-way trailer park where they lived. There was little to do then, less to worry about. It was almost like the uncomplicated days of elementary school, except that Onew had fewer friends now. Whereas Key, with his new looks and body, had a growing host of admirers- whether he chose to notice them or not.

Onew pulled his knees up to his chest and sank toward the floor of the pool. He sat suspended there a moment, grazing the heavy plastic liner on the pool’s bottom, listening to the clanking underwater sounds that seemed to come from nowhere. He kept his eyes squeezed shut and spouted bubbles from his nose until he felt himself running out of air, and then he pushed himself to the surface and waded over to where Key was now lying on his back. White lines of flesh showed along the edges of his trunks, and his navel seemed somehow perfectly placed on his taut, flat stomach. Onew pulled himself out of the water and sat down beside him on the deck’s edge.

Key groaned and sat up suddenly. “Shit, Onew,” he said laughing. “You’re dripping on me. It’s freezing.”

A/N: Oh mannn it just. dream. :/ I felt like writing it. LOL. So guys. i did like. 5 chapters of Black Wolf. then. my laptop reset. -cries- Its okay. I'll just over...-rocksbackandforthinchair-
So in the meantime..:D
Do enjoy! :D

Commmment, plz and ty :D
:] <3

Black Wolf Chapter 1 (Part B)

I was still standing there five minutes later when the living room door opened and mom came out.

“You okay sweetie?” she said.

I looked up at her. “Yeah…I’m fine.”

She looked at the phone, and then looked back at me. “How’s Taemin?”

“He’s alright… he’s moving soon. His dad got a new job in Paris. He’s setting up some kind of theater or something. They’re all moving there in September.” I didn’t know why I was telling her all this. I suppose I was still a bit surprised, a bit confused even. I was just opening my mouth to create noises. “Taemin asked me if I wanted to go to the fair on Saturday with Minho and Jonghyun.”

“Sounds nice,” my mom said.

I shrugged.

She said, “You don’t want to go?”

“I don’t know…”

“It’ll do you good.”

I looked at her.

She smiled sadly at me.  “You need to go outside a bit more, Onew-ah. Get some fresh air. You can spend all your time sitting around the house.”

“I don’t spend all my time sitting around the house, sometimes I sit in the garden.”

She shook her head. “I’m serious Jinki. I worry about you.”

“You don’t have anything to worry about.”

“But you never do anything anymore. You don’t go outside, you’re not interested in anything, and you just lie around all day.” She gave me a worried look. “What about all the stuff you used to do?”

“What stuff?”

“Badminton? You used to play badminton every Saturday. And there was that student council group you used to go to, the one at the library. You used to really like that.”

I shrugged again. “I do still like that…I just. I don’t know.”

“Alright” my mom said. “What about your piano? You haven’t touched it in months…it’s just lying there in the living room, collecting dust. You used to practice all the time. You were getting really good…”

“No I wasn’t.”

Mom gave me another long look. “You’d tell me if anything was wrong right?”

“There’s nothing wrong, mom. I’m fine. Really.”

“You’re not worried about anything are you?”


“Your SAT’s?”



“Mom,” I said firmly, “I already told you, I’m not worried about anything, okay? I’m fine. I’m just…a bit tired.”

“Tired? What kind of tired?”

“I don’t know…”

She looked closely at my eyes, studying my pupils.

“No,” I sighed, “I’m not doing drugs.”

She looked back at me again. “I’m only trying to help, Onew.”

“I don’t need help.”

“You shouldn’t be tired and down all the time,” she said, shaking her head. “Not at your age, it’s not right.”

I smiled at her. “It’s probably a phase I’m going through. Hormones or something.”

She tried to smile back, but couldn’t quite manage to. And that hurt me a little. I didn’t like upsetting her.

“It’s okay mom,” I said quietly. “Really, everything’s okay. I’m just feeling a bit funny right now, it’s like I’m between things, you know? Like I’m not sure where I’m going. It’s not a big deal; it’s just a bit…”

“Funny?” Mom suggested.


She nodded. “Well, okay. But if it gets any worse…”

“I’ll let you know, honest.”

She raised her eyebrow at me. “Honest honest?”

“Yeah,” I smiled. “Cross my heart and hope to die.”

I didn’t get to sleep that night. I lay on my bed, staring into the moonlit darkness. There were so many thoughts in my head. I could just feel them seeping out of my skull. Sweaty thoughts. Sticky and salty, oozing out of my ears, my eyes, my mouth, my skin.




The sound of Taemin’s voice: “If you want to stay over, you’re welcome to…no strings attached.

The pictures in my head: Taemin and I at a party when we were younger locked in a bathroom together…to young to know what we were doing but trying anyway.

You can’t say no to me.”

I got out of bed then, covered in sweat, and went over to the window. The air was stuffy and thick, the night warm and still. I wasn’t wearing any pj’s or anything. It was too hot. There was no breeze coming in through the window, but I could feel the sweat beginning to cool on my skin.

I shivered.

Hot and cold.

It was early in the morning now. Two? Three? Something like that. The street below me was empty and quiet, but I could hear faint sounds from the main street nearby, the occasional passing cars, late-night clubbers going home, a distant yell, and drunken voices.

The sounds of the night.

I gazed down the street at Key’s house. It was dark, the curtains closed, the lights out. In the pale glow of the streetlight, I could see the alleyway that leads to the back of his house, and I could see all the crap on his front yard- bike frames, boxes, random pieces of wood, garbage bags. I stared at Key’s window, wondering if he was there or not.

Key didn’t always spend the night in his room. Sometimes he would wait until his parents were asleep and creep downstairs, go outside and spend the night in the garden with his dog. It wasn’t a dog really. That thing looked more like a wolf. He kept it in a huge shed in the back of his backyard. If the night was cold, he’d take his ‘dog’ up into the shed with him and they’d huddle together in some blankets. But on a warm night, like tonight, he’d let the ‘dog’ outside of the shed, and they’d both sit in the garden, quiet and content beneath the summer stars.

I wondered if they were there now.

Key and his Black Wolf.

It all started for Key when he was eleven and his parents gave him a puppy for his birthday. It was a scrawny little thing, black all over, with slightly glazed eyes, a tangled tail, and big patches of mangy fur down its back. I thought Key’s dad bought it off someone in a bar or something. Or maybe he just found it…I don’t know. Wherever his dad got it from, Key was pretty surprised to get a puppy for his birthday. Firstly, because he didn’t ask for one and this was the first time he had ever received a present from his parents without asking for it. Secondly, his parents usually forgot his birthday. And lastly, Key had admitted to me, he didn’t even like puppies at the time.

He didn’t let his parents know that though. They wouldn’t have liked it. And Key had learned a long while ago that it wasn’t a good idea to displease his parents, so he had thanked them very much, and smiled awkwardly. He held the puppy and stroked it.

“What are you going to call him?” his mother had asked him.

“Key,” said Key. “I’ll name him Key.”

But he was lying. He wasn’t going to call the puppy Key. He wasn’t going to call it anything. Why? It was a puppy. A puppy with slightly glazed eyes, a matted tail, and big patches of mangy fur down its back. Puppies don’t have names. Especially ones with slightly glazed eyes, a matted tail, and big patches of mangy fur down its back. They didn’t need names. They’re just dumb little animals.

It was probably a year later that Key told me his ‘dog’ had started talking to him. I thought at first he was just kidding, making up one of his crazy stories-He always had odd little stories to tell- but after a while I began to realize he was serious. We were down by the river one time- just us two, hanging out by the bank, looking for rats, skipping stones across the river, the usual stuff- and Key started telling me about his ‘dog’. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he believed. He believed in the words his dog was saying.

“I know it sounds really dumb,” he told me, “and I know he’s not really talking to me, but it’s like I can hear things in my head.”

“Why kind of things?” I asked him.

“I don’t know, words…I guess. But they’re not really words. They’re like…I don’t know…just whispers of the wind.”

“Yeah, but how do you know they’re not coming from your dog?” I said. “I mean, it could just be some weird thing going on in your head.”

“He tells me things.”

I stared at him. “What kind of things?”

Key shrugged and threw a pebble into the river. “Just things… sometimes like a hello or something. Thank you. Things like that.”

“Is that it? Just Hello and Thanks?”

Key gazed thoughtfully across the river, his eyes distant. When he spoke his voice sounded strange. “A fine sky this evening…”

“What?” I said.

“That’s what the Black Wolf said last night. He told me it was a fine evening.”

“A fine sky this evening?”

“Yeah…and green is fresh like water. He said that too. And the other day he said This good wooden house and Straw smell blue sky. He says all kinds of things.”

Key went quiet then, and I couldn’t think of anything else to say, so we just sat there for a while, not doing anything, just staring in silence at the murky brown water of the river.

After a few minutes, Key turned to me. “I know it doesn’t make any sense, hyung, I know it’s kinda weird…but I really like it. It’s like when I get home every day and I go down to the shed in my backyard and I feed Black Wolf and give him fresh water and let him out for a run and clean his cage. It’s like I have this friend that tells me stuff that won’t hurt me. It makes me feel good. You know?”

I shivered again. The sweat on my skin had dried on my skin now and I was beginning to feel good enough to get back into bed. I stayed at the window a bit longer though, thinking about Key, wondering if he was out there… sitting in the darkness, listening to the whispers of the wind.

A fine sky this evening.

This good wooden house.

Straw smell blue sky.

I thought about what Taemin said- about Key not wanting to go to the carnival on Saturday- and I knew he was probably right. I was pretty sure that he’d want to go if it was just me and him, but I didn’t know how he’d feel about meeting up with the others. I didn’t know how I felt about it myself, either. Taemin and Minho? Jonghyun Kim? It just seemed so…I don’t know. Like going back to the past: back to elementary, sitting together at the back of the classroom; in middle school, watching out for each other at the park, hanging out after school, spending our weekends and school vacations together.

We were friends then.

We had connections: Taemin and Minho were twins, Taemin and I pretended we loved each other, Jonghyun looked up to Minho, Minho looked after Taemin…


But then was then and now is now. We were different. We were kids. And we aren’t kids anymore. We moved on to high school, turned fourteen, fifteen, and sixteen…and things had gradually changed. You know what I mean. The world gets bigger, things drift apart, and your childhood friends become friends you used to know. I mean you see them at school every day but you can only manage a hello to them. They’re just not what they were anymore.

The world gets bigger.

Not everything changes though.

Key and I have never changed. Our world never got any bigger. We’ve always been friends. We’d been friends before the others; we’d been friends with the others and apart from them. And in many ways, we’ve been friends in spite of the others.

We are friends.

Then and now.

And so the idea of getting together on Saturday…well, it just felt strange. A bit scary too, I guess. A bit pointless, even. But at the same time, it was exciting. Exciting in a strangely scary and pointless way.

I turned away from the window and now was gazing over at a black porcelain wolf that I kept on top of my chest of drawers. It was a sixteenth birthday present from Key. A black porcelain wolf, thankfully not life-sized, resting on all fours. It’s a beautiful thing- glossy and smooth, with shining green eyes and a face that seemed to be smiling. It’s as if the wolf was thinking about something that had happened a while ago, something happy, something that it kept with it.

I don’t usually get emotional about things, but I was really quite touched when Key gave me the wolf. Everyone else gave me regular presents that you’d give on a birthday- Mom and Dad gave me money, a girl I’d gone out with a couple of times had given me a night to remember, and I gotten a few cards and things from friends at school- but this, Key’s wolf…it was a proper present, meaningful. It was serious, given with thought and feeling.

“You don’t have to keep it if you don’t want to,” Key had mumbled awkwardly as he watched me unwrap it. “I know it’s a bit…well…I mean if you don’t like it…”

“Thanks, Key,” I told him, holding the porcelain wolf in my hands. “It’s wonderful. I love it. Thanks.”

He lowered his eyes and smiled then, and the way that made me feel was better than all the best Christmas and birthday presents altogether.

I looked at the wolf now- its porcelain body shimmering in the moonlight. Its green eyes shining.

“What do you think Key?” I said quietly. “Do you want to go to the carnival, take a trip down memory lane? Or should we both just stay here, hiding away in our small worlds?”

I didn’t know what I was expecting, but the porcelain wolf didn’t say anything to me. It just sat there green-eyed and smiling, gazing at nothing. After a while, I began to feel pretty stupid- standing by the window in the middle of the night. Naked and alone, talking to a porcelain dog.

Mom was right. I definitely needed to get out a bit more.

I shook my head and got back to bed.

A/N: Oh my bleeping lord. LOL. That was the longest chapter I’ve written. Ever. Well …I’m going to continue this…so probably not the end of the ‘long chapter’ situation. :/ But that’s okay! For you I will! :D So remember guys, COMMENT. AND THERE WILL BE MORE ONKEY SEXINESS TO COME. And that reminds me, I know I know. It seems like there’s more OnTae action. But that’s how it’s gonna be. OnTae sexiness and Onkey puppy love. Don’t like? I didn’t force you to read it. But. Please give it a chance, kay? Thanks :D

Love and Kissssessss~





); This was too long to put into one post.

My children: 

Black Wolf Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The summer of this story started for me on a hot Thursday night in the end of July, just as the sun was setting. I wasn’t doing anything at the time- just lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling-so I didn’t exactly see the sun setting, but I was pretty sure it was out there somewhere. Everything was out there somewhere- the sun-streaked horizon, the fading red sky, the stars, the moon, the rest of the world- I just didn’t want anything to do with it.

I didn’t want anything to do with anything back then.

All I wanted to do was like on my bed and stare at the ceiling.

I don’t know where this lack of energy had come from- and I don’t suppose I really cared, either- but in the three weeks or so since school had ended, I seemed to have gotten into the habit of not doing anything and it was a hard habit to break. Getting up late every morning, hanging around the house for hours, sitting out in the sun for a while…maybe reading, or maybe not. What did it matter? The way I saw it, the days and nights would pass whether I did anything or not. And they did. The mornings passed, the afternoons passed, the evenings turned into sunsets…and before I knew it, I’d be lying on my bed again, staring at the ceiling, wondering where the day went, and why I hadn’t done anything, and why I still haven’t thought of doing anything.

There were plenty of things I could be doing. It was only 9:30. I could be watching TV, or a DVD, or getting ready to go out somewhere. I could have been doing all three.

But I knew I wasn’t going to.

I was happy with doing nothing.

Happy enough?

I don’t know.

I guess so.

So, anyway, that’s what I was doing until the phone rang. I was lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling, minding my own business. The sound of the phone ringing didn’t really mean anything to me. It was just a noise, the familiar dull ring of the phone in the hallway downstairs, and I knew it wasn’t for me. It was probably just dad, calling from work, or one of mom’s friends, calling to talk.

It wasn’t something to be excited about.

It was anything to get anything about.

It was just something to listen to.

I could hear mom downstairs now-coming out of the living room, walking down the hall, clearing her throat, and picking up the phone.


A short pause.

Then, “Oh hello Taemin. How are you?”

Taemin? My heart quickened slightly.


“Onew!” My mom called out. “Phone!”

I didn’t move for a moment. I just lay there on the bed, staring at my door, trying to work out why Taemin Lee would be calling me at 9:30 on a Thursday night. Why would he be calling me at all? He hasn’t called me in ages.

“Onew!” My mom called out again, louder. “Phone!”

I didn’t really feel like talking to anyone then, and I sort of thought of telling mom to tell Taemin to that I was out, that I’d call him back later, but then I realized that in order to do that I’d have to get up and go downstairs anyway and then explain to mom why I didn’t want to talk to him in the first place.

I couldn’t be bothered with all that.

And even if I could.

Well it wasn’t just anyone on the phone. Was it?

It was Taemin Lee.

I got up off my bed, stretched, and made my way downstairs.



When I got downstairs, mom was standing at the end of the hallway with her hand over the phone.

“It’s Taemin,” she said in an exaggerated whisper, mouthing the words like it was some kind of secret.

“Thanks,” I told her, taking the phone from her hand. I waited until she went back to the living room, then I put the phone to my ear. “Hello?”

“Good evening,” a fake accented voice said. “Is this Mr. Lee Jinki?”

“Hey Taemin.”

“Aw man,” he laughed. “How’d you know it was me?”

“I’m telepathic,” I said. “I was just thinking about you when the phone rang-“

“Liar. Your mom told you.”


Taemin laughed again. It was a nice laugh, kind of husky and sweet, and it brought back good memories, of other times which I thought I had forgotten.

“I’m not interrupting anything, right?” he said.

“Like what?”

“Nothing…it’s just that you took a long time getting to the phone. And I heard your mom covering the phone and whispering.”

“She always does that,” I said. “It doesn’t mean anything, I was just upstairs…”

“By yourself?”

I could hear the smile in his voice.

“Yeah.” I said. “By myself.”


I stared at the wall, listening to the silence on the other end, imagining the look on Taemin’s face- amused, attentive, and secretive.

“So, hyung,” he continued. “Sup?”

“Nothing much.”

“Whatcha been up to?”

“Not much, you?”

He sighed. “All I’ve been doing these few weeks is packing.”


“Yeah, you know…when I go to Paris.”

“I thought you were going in September.”

“We’re not, but mom and dad are away for the next few weeks and they’re trying to finish the packing before they go. There’s all these boxes and stuff all over the place. It’s like living in a warehouse.”

“Sounds fun.”


I kept quiet for a bit, not saying anything, waiting to find out what he really wanted to talk about. Taemin had never been one for small talk, and I knew he wouldn’t have called me after all this time to talk about boxes. So I just waited.

Eventually he said, “Hyung-ah, are you still there?”


“What are you doing on Saturday?”

“Saturday? Not much. Why?”

“You know the fair down at the park?”


“Well, it’s the last day on Saturday, so maybe we could just…hang out. You know us four. You, me, Jonghyun, Minho. For old times’ sake.”

“Old times?”

“Yeah you know, the gang, the four of us. I mean it wasn’t that long ago. I just thought…”


“I just thought we should all meet up again before it’s too late.”

“Too late?”

“Well, you’re going to college, me and Minho are going to Paris, Jonghyun’s probably going to get a job…this might be the last chance to see each other.”

“I guess…”

“Come on hyung, Minho and Jonghyun are up for it. We’re going to meet at the den.”

“The den?”

He laughed. “Yeah I know… I was thinking about it, remembering how we built it and everything, and I thought it’d be a nice place to meet up for the last time. It’ll be fun, just like the old times. Bring a few bottles, get a bit drunk…then we can go to the fair together!” He laughed again. “You have to come hyung! It won’t be the same without you.”

“What about Key?”

He hesitated. “Key? Kim Kibum?”

“Yeah, it wasn’t just the four of us, Key was there too.”

“Well I know, but Key…I mean it’s not really his kind of thing…is it?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know, going out to the fair, meeting up? I don’t think he’d enjoy it, that’s all.”

“Why not?”

“Look hyung,” he sighed. “I’m not saying I don’t want Key to come-“

“What are you saying then?”

“Nothing, it’s just-“


“Nothing, it doesn’t matter.” He sighed again. “If you want him to come...”

“I don’t even know if I’m going yet.”

“Of course you are.” He said, suddenly lightening up. “You can’t say no to me.”


He laughed again, but this time a bit forced, leaving the impression that he was making himself go along with the joke, when he actually wanted to be serious. I didn’t know how I felt about that. There was something that made the way he was talking to me almost intimate. If I didn’t know better, I would’ve thought he was flirting with me. But I did know better. Taemin Lee wouldn’t flirt with me. We were past that now. We hardly knew each other anymore. We moved into different circles. We did different things. We had different friends. All we had in common now was the shared memories of times with the gang. Memories of long days by the river, or the woods...Memories of breathless young kisses and awkward fumbles in the abandoned factory at the back of the lane…

Memories. That’s what they all were.

Kids stuff.

“Onew?” I heard Taemin say. “You still there?”


“I said, don’t forget to bring a bottle.”


“A bottle, something to drink. On Saturday.”

“Oh…right. Okay.”

“We’re meeting at the den at nine-thirty, kay?”

“Back lane?”

“Yeah, the one up the bank, near the old factory. Opposite the towers.”


He hesitated for a moment. “Are you still thinking of bringing Key?”

“I don’t see why not.”

“Kay, but you can’t spend the whole night looking after him.”

“Key doesn’t need looking after.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just…” His voice trailed off and I heard him light a cigarette. “Anyway.” He went on. “After the fair, we’re going to my place. Mom and dad will be away by then, so…you know…if you want to stay over, you’re welcome to.” He paused for a bit, and added quietly. “No strings attached.”


“Well, I’ll see you Saturday, then.”




“Kay. See you…”

“Yeah, bye.”

You know what it’s like when you talk to someone, and at the time you’re not quite sure what to say, but then, when they’ve gone, and you’ve had time to think about it, you realize that in fact you haven’t got a clue what they’re trying to say? Well, that’s how I felt after I said bye to Taemin. I just stood there in the hallway, staring stupidly at the floor, thinking to myself…

Old times?



What the hell was that about?

Part B~

Since you took my heart, i've got a missing part.
It wasn't easy to explain his feelings to her.

Sometimes it pained him so much, he'd lose control of his limbs and shake uncontrollably.

Her smile remained, tattooed in his memories.

They'd pass each other in the hallway and all they could manage was "Hey...". There'd be a smile from her occasionally but he failed to return it.

Regret would build in his heart and the next day he'd try to walk the same hallway in hopes of seeing her again to apologize.

She would never show.

Then he'd give up and return to his usual path.

Seeing her again, the cycle repeated.

Another smile. "I didn't see you yesterday, you okay?" Sympathy perhaps?

He couldn't respond. The pain returned.

The late bell rang, but regardless, the two remained in the hallway. "It's my free, you too?" She pulled him to the side. It wasn't but he stayed.

The need to say something punctured him.

As his mouth opened, her arms wrapped around him, engulfing him with a blanket of warmth.

He returned the embrace, hesitant to hold her in his arms once again, but the comfort of her embrace was dominant.

A sound like a chuckle and sign emerged from her lips. "You still smell good." A outline of her smile pressed through his shirt. She held on tighter.

A tear seeped into his attire.

She grasped his shirt. "I missed you, you know?" A sniffle.

He held her closer to himself, regardless of her tears.

With a hand on her head, slowly stroking, reassuring her.

Another grasping her waist, he opened his mouth to speak.

"I know, I missed you too."

He closed his eyes, letting a tear escape, falling into her hair.

A/N: Just so you know~ Key is the girl.
I don't know why i suddenly felt like writing this on the subway...but i did. It looked way longer on my iTouch i swear.
and i'm kinda new to livejournal sooo.
teach me! -bows-

Much appreciation!


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